October 25, 2016

East Berlin

I just came back from a long-weekend in Germany. Little boy and I went to Berlin to visit older boy, who is in Berlin for an internship this fall. We didn’t visit any of the conventional tourist attractions, except the Reichstag building, the parliament, from where Germany (and Greece) are being ruled. Most of the time we spent in East Berlin, the former Soviet sector.

We went to a suburb east of the city center to watch a football (soccer of course) game with FC Union in 2. Bundesliga. The game wasn’t too good, but it was really cool to be on the packed stand with 20.000 crazy people. The red shirts of FC Union bear a witness of the working-class background of the club. The supporters called their team Eisern Union (Iron Union). We were surrounded by factory workers who enjoyed their free weekend, and unemployed craftsmen who lost their jobs to the Polish and Lithuanians who do their work for a lower price. Citizens of the European Union.

Near the tram station in Warschauer Strasse (Warsaw Street), we passed a homeless young man sitting on the side walk with his sleeping bag and a filthy dog. In front of him, he had three cups labeled “food”, “weed” and “BMW”. In the “food” cup there were some coins, the other two were almost empty. I dropped 2 Euro in the “weed” cup and 3 Euro in his “BMW” cup. Homeless people have dreams for the future too. And in the meantime some weed may be good for the comport, in the brutal capitalist world.

At night we went to concerts in small obscure clubs in old East German industry buildings, to enjoy Berlin’s underground music scene. The beer was good, and people were nice and friendly. Some bands were good, some not so good. The lead guitar player in one of the garage-rock bands was a 48 yo professor at Humboldt University. He performed under a stage-name/pseudonym to avoid mixing business and pleasure. I immediately felt a connection with him; a guy with a PhD and some obscure and secret cultural interests on the side.

It was good to get away for a while. Nobody yelling at me. Nobody asking me difficult questions. Nobody interrogating me about scary thoughts in the darkest corners of my soul. It was a true feeling of freedom, for a while >:)

(Some pictures taken in Berlin, RAW Gelande, former train repair station and now subcultural center (top), football game with FC Union (2nd), East Berlin's famous Ampfelmann (3rd), and garage rock concert (bottom). The Humboldt professor is the guitar player to the right. Fortunately, the picture is to unfocused to see his face.)

October 6, 2016

Question of the Month: What’s a decision you’ve made in the past ... ?

The question of the month is:
"What's a decision you've made in the past that you know, logically, was the right decision to make, but witch you still feel guilty and regretful about"
That's an interesting question, and also a scary one, because it's an existential question.

The world and our lives have no essential meaning. It's up to us to fill our lives with meaning, and we have the freedom to do this. This freedom isn't only good, because the freedom of choice leads to angst of making irresponsible or wrong choices.

The French-Algerian Nobel Prize winning author and existentialist philosopher Albert Camus once said:
"The only serious question in life is weather to kill yourself or not"
That's probably true. I've been considering this a couple of times, and come to the decision not to. I don't know if it was the right decision, but I don't regret it.

So that's probably not an answer to the Question of the Month. What else could I bring up?  Should I leave the country? Should I leave my wife? Should I ever have gotten married? I don't know, and I don't think I care  to answer. I only now what what is logically right, but I don't know if I would regret it >:)

(A selfie from my archives. Skiing season is not too far away. It's one of the tings I do to bring meaning to my meaningless life. The skis in the picture were awesome. Unfortunately, I don't have them anymore. They were stolen outside the restaurant when I was eating lunch.) 

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